Oh yes. Since he was my primary teacher, and I was essentially an 'orphan', he was the last authority on anything to with me, to the exclusion of my foster-mothers, who had dealt with children who had problems before. [Tris smiles bitterly.] Niklaren... had some sort of ideological problem with mind-healers. He graciously permitted me to see Winding Circle's mind-healers after I'd managed to slaughter an entire pirate fleet, but when it seemed I was "over" that trauma, he put an end to it.
And, of course, I thought there was nothing wrong with that, seeing as I'd never seen a mind-healer in my life. Unfortunately, it wasn't until I had... a fairly severe breakdown that everyone realized how poorly things went. [She looks distant for a minute.] A mage's control centers on their emotional control... Well, that, and external controls can be placed, but they are-- quite literally taking part of that mage's soul and co-opting their will as much as anything. That was the alternative Niklaren implied I could take if I didn't accept my medallion.
I was scared to show that I felt like I was losing a grip on my control, terrified that would be my fate- I had a cousin killed because he allowed someone to take control of him that way. ...As you can see, I lost a great deal of weight, among other things. I was eating scarcely enough to keep alive... Well, Sandry, one of my foster-sisters, noticed something was very wrong... and decided to get to the bottom of it.
As reigning duchess of the Duchy of Emelan, she carries a fair bit of clout, and her ties to Winding Circle temple are nothing to sneeze at. Should Niklaren set so much as a toe in Emelan, she will know, and... the results will not be pretty.
[in person]
And, of course, I thought there was nothing wrong with that, seeing as I'd never seen a mind-healer in my life. Unfortunately, it wasn't until I had... a fairly severe breakdown that everyone realized how poorly things went. [She looks distant for a minute.] A mage's control centers on their emotional control... Well, that, and external controls can be placed, but they are-- quite literally taking part of that mage's soul and co-opting their will as much as anything. That was the alternative Niklaren implied I could take if I didn't accept my medallion.
I was scared to show that I felt like I was losing a grip on my control, terrified that would be my fate- I had a cousin killed because he allowed someone to take control of him that way. ...As you can see, I lost a great deal of weight, among other things. I was eating scarcely enough to keep alive... Well, Sandry, one of my foster-sisters, noticed something was very wrong... and decided to get to the bottom of it.
As reigning duchess of the Duchy of Emelan, she carries a fair bit of clout, and her ties to Winding Circle temple are nothing to sneeze at. Should Niklaren set so much as a toe in Emelan, she will know, and... the results will not be pretty.