badfic_manor | round 001 || Knuckle || [accidental video]

Entry tags:

round 001 || Knuckle || [accidental video]

[The feed comes on to a nice shot of a pair of shoes, and the bottom of some sort of black robe.]

What in heaven's name is thi-

[He turns the device around so that his face finally comes into view and he immediately freezes up the moment he sees his face on the tiny little device. Very slowly and carefully just places the device back where he found it. He was not sure what the little device was, but he was sure that he PROBABLY shouldn't be touching it. The priest wandered out into the hall, and for anyone who may remember a certain Sasagawa Ryohei... well... the shouting will be very nostalgic.]

EXCUSE ME?! IS ANYONE HERE?! I SEEM TO BE VERY LOST, TO THE MAX!

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A scientist that diddles in stiffies fer rocket ships an rap.

[There's a disturbing, blessed, horrifying silence. Until the most grody sputtering and choking sound takes over. It's Badou and he's laughing, dumbfounded.] Are you fuckin kiddin me? Holy tits, that is just the tits...Yeah that helps a lot, man. I've determined that 'm talkin' to a grandpa that doesn't know the pleasures of cable television yet. Jesus...makes ya think, don't it.

Diddles and what for what?

[There was a moment. A brief moment. Where Knuckle actually pondered if at the very least the devil would be easier to understand. Even if he recanted Latin backwards it couldn't be as confusing as this!]

Cable... what?

[Case in point.]

[Sigh, this GUY! Cut Badou a little slack, the teaching pension ain't what it used to be. Would he even be paid for this? Cause speaking in tongues ain't got JACK on Badou's swag. People do still say swag right?]

Science. Proves why rain an boners fall like the holy fuckin roman empire. Rap. It's this...thing that's supposedly music an summons the devil, Kanye. Or so I've heard.

[SMACK of Badou's palm once again meeting his forehead.] T.V TOO?! SERIOUSLY?! Fuck...we're gonna need a Baywatch marathon. Stat. S'alright man, I'll hook ya up.

[Oh you are getting all the slack Badou. No one liked explaining things to Knuckle a hundred years ago because well....]

...It rains bones in the future? I have experience with bays at least. I grew up on Manhattan island, on the upper New York Bay.

[This would happen. He honestly thinks the bay thing is an accomplishment. Points for effort at least.]

[Tch FINE. As long as there are no pants-ly kind of slacks, tis acceptable. As soon as the words reach his ears Badou can feel his head twinge in sympathy to those poor martyrs a hundred years ago. It's like they're all connected in the circle of headaches.

No these kinds'a....bones...[There's a definite MANLY giggle] are more meaty an veiny. That's not the-....nonononono. No. No. You won't fuckin ruin this for me with marine life, whales, an ships that don't include Pam Anderson an that one chick. I won't let you. The tits, man. The. Tits. Jigglin' around. Shit, we need to get you back to the future stat!

[Oh, look he's talking about birds again. He must be some kind of bird hobbyist.]

Well, I never quite spent much time by the bay enough to look for birds....

[There's just this ominous, stunned silence. Then-]

Are you fuckin' /high/? What the hell do birds gotta do with anythin. Were you even listenin? Clean your ears, goddamn.
Boobs. Boobies. Mammories. Jugs. Tatas. Knockers. Hooters. Milkshakes. Uhhhh what do prudes use to refer to tits...OH! Breasts.

We've got a lotta work ahead of us. I expect my payment fer these lessons on time.

[So Birds, containers, owls, milk drinks- oh. He's talking about... why would he talk about something like that!? That was just...]

O-oh...

[Just excuse him while he's flustering... but oh! Low and behold! A DISTRACTION!]

Pay...? Pay for what?

[Realized it ain't a grocery list yet, slick? Bout time.]

YEAAAAAAAAH! Now ya got it? Lesson the first: most nicknames are root words about tits. In latin. Or close to it.

Hey now, don't get any funky ideas. The funky era was waaaay after your time, gramps. Payment fer the information, of course! Gotta make my livin' somehow.

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round 001 || Knuckle || [accidental video]

[audio]

Re: [audio]

[audio]

oh god I can't believe I let this tag sit so long I AM SO SORRY.

YOU SHHHHH its okay! You've been hella occupied + gone, I understand and will wait 5eva for this

And then I get kidnapped by a small child for a while. I'LL BE BETTER SOMEDAY.

They're a menace to society. It's okayyyy I'm telling you! I believe in you

AND FINALLY. A TIMELY RESPONSE.

FUCK YESssss helllooo there!~