badfic_manor | [Video/Action] Arrival of the lazy tard

[Video/Action] Arrival of the lazy tard

[The video feed turns on but the screen is almost pitch black. There's an odd clicking sound, like someone is pressing on the communicator's keys. Or more like keysmashing. Lampo has it in his pocket, and is randomly pressing down on the buttons just because. He has accidentally turned on the camera.]

Nee...where am I...

[There's the sound of a door opening and closing. One would assume that Lampo has stepped outside. But then there's the sound of a bed creaking and the light inside of the pocket changing slightly. Lampo has decided to lay back down on the bed.]

Ore-sama isn't happy...Where is this place, mnyeh...

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[Pushing buttons?

Lampo takes the Blackberry out of his pocket...and throws it up in the air when he sees the young man's face.]

Wha-wha-what are you doing there?!

[This is some kind of witchcraft, isn't it? The guy did say 'gods'. Without thinking on it further, Lampo starts stomping on the device.]

[And this is the secret to why he's given up on terrorizing you... it feels like swatting a fly with a Buick.]

I'm not in it; it's sending my image and voice. I'm in my room, down the hall, with one just like it, and you may want to stop trying to destroy it.

[And he stops. Not because the head says so, but because he's ~~getting lazy~~ ~~getting tired~~ not harming the thing any.]

Ho...how? Is it magic?

[And he leans forward a little to look at it closer but noooo, not touching the thing.]

I'd say it's just technology more advanced than what you're familiar with, but with how things work here, I can't say how it works exactly.

After all, this place used to have a generator run by gerbils. Until the squirrels ate them.

[That last bit has the special deadpan of someone who is well aware that he probably sounds like he drank too much or doesn't have all the lights on in the attic.]

...What?

[Stare.]

[Yeah, that's about an accurate assessment.]

Welcome to the Manor. You're probably going to have that reaction a lot for a while.

For the record, I can't tell you a way out because I don't know either; I'm another one of the people that was brought here, same as you.

...They kidnapped a whole group of people? What do they want mnyeh?

That... doesn't really have an answer; the person responsible isn't even aware of it - this space exists separate from wherever she is, and she doesn't seem to know that it's real.

People get brought here for however long, and eventually end up sent home again; from everything I've been able to tell, it doesn't matter how long you're here, you return at the moment you'd vanished from, so generally nobody even seems to realize you were missing.

And, in the meantime, you're stuck dealing with a malleable reality that follows the whims of a bored and oblivious teenage girl, as well as whoever else happens to be stuck here.

[Yes, this is something he's used to going over with people. yes, he has been here for a while.]

...So I'm not in Italy?

[Yes, you can bet he got lazy and didn't listen to everything you just said.]

.....

[You're a special snowflake, aren't you.]

No, you're not in Italy.

You're in some loopy teenage girl's private pocket dimension.

[Italy --> from dress and the way he reacted to the Blackberry he'd guess about late 1800's --> use of a title that wasn't familial in context of "family" as a threat --> ...oh look. Early Mafia.]

And I haven't heard of any Dons showing up here... or any other mafia from your time period that I know of.

[LITTLE DOES HE KNOW-]

N-No one's here..?

[And Lampo's leaning even closer to the device. Also, getting teary-eyed.]

[ ....... You're Mafia. You're end-of-the-Italian-Unification-War Mafia. Seriously?]

[Your Don must be one of the most patient Mafioso in existence.]

Not that I've heard of? We've had a few other new arrivals - a couple of which might be a similar time period, but...

One's a priest, or - at least dressed like one...

And the other was wearing French military dress and already seemed to know his way around the technology.

[He pays attention to the network, at least...]

[A priest? There's a verrrry slim chance but--]

Is the priest's name 'Knuckle', mnyeh?

I actually haven't spoken to him myself... he hasn't been here very long, but he doesn't seem hard to find - I don't see what you'd have to lose.

[As much as Saguru's well aware that being a priest doesn't mean someone's a good person.... what little he's seen has done about the opposite of set off alarms.]

[And Lampo visibly deflaaaates. Like literally. He's slumping to the ground with a sigh.

(Because the man doesn't know if it's Knuckle and because he so doesn't want to have to look for someone who might not even be Knuckle. He doesn't know how large this place is but he knows it's going to be a lot of work!)]

Edited 2012-06-11 10:30 (UTC)

[...he's trying to figure out what post you would've held in a Mafia family; right now his money's on something like "mascot".]

...There's one kitchen, one dining area, and not that many people here right now; it shouldn't be too hard to just keep an eye out for the only one in priest robes...

[Wait. Wait. He pulls a notebook out of his jacket, flipping through it.]

...Actually that might be him; I've seen the nameplate but hadn't connected it to who lived in that room before.

Edited 2012-06-11 10:37 (UTC)

[And that actually makes Lambo look up with a hopeful smile!]

Does he have a piece of bandage across his nose?

[Well, that's one thing, at least.]

It sounds like you have your man.

Is there anyone else I should be looking out for or letting know you're here? I try to keep track of who's here, at least by the nameplates.

[At which he's holding up that journal.]

[The happy look on his face? Yeah, it's obviouse you're forgiven for trolling him. ~~Not that Lampo actually noticed.~~ And at the offer he gets comfy--yup, right there on the floor. Doesn't bother moving to the bed, he just crosses his legs and sits there--leaning back on the door for even less effort!]

Ummm...there's Primo, G, Ugetsu and Alaude...[Hesitates, but continues]...and Daemon Spade.

[...most of which he hasn't seen, as he's glancing through the notebook to make sure... well, except that last one which... kind of sticks out - and from the hesitation, it's one the other boy probably wouldn't be thrilled to see.]

...Unfortunately, the only other one that's here is that last one.

D-D-Daemon's here?

[Yep, DNW.]

Room 69, South hallway. [And he shuts the notebook on that; yes, he keeps track of room numbers.]

If he's from where and when you're from, then... if he's not prone to wearing a French military jacket, I haven't seen him - and if he is, I haven't seen much of him.

[He hasn't been very tempted to seek the man out - he knows he's short on backup if he does something stupid, so he's trying not to tangle with bigger predators right now. ~~That and he's not allowed. WHY DO MY MUSES ALWAYS WANT TO STALK/HARASS/MURDER EACH OTHER. CAN'T YOU JUST GET ALONG?!~~]

That's him alright...

[Looooooooong groan.]

At least Knuckle's here mnyeh...

[...Yep, that's an unpleasant history, although it's hard to gauge how bad.]

Is he likely to start trouble?

[GODDAMNIT SAGURU STOP LABELING SOME OF MY OTHER CHARACTERS 'PERSONS OF INTEREST'. YOU'RE NOT EVEN ALLOWED TO DO ANYTHING TO/ABOUT THEM, AND YOU HAVE NOBODY TO COOPERATE WITH IF HE DOES DO SOMETHING BUT MIKAMI RIGHT NOW, SO WHY ARE YOU EVEN. STUPID STUPID DETECTIVE AAARGH IF THIS GETS YOU KILLED SOMEHOW I'M GOING TO LAUGH.]

I don't know....

[Lampo doesn't wanna think about iiiit. ~~and YOU tell me!~~]

[Video/Action] Arrival of the lazy tard

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