badfic_manor | Session 003 ^_^ Radical Edward ^

[The video shows Ed from behind, but her size, mess of red hair, seemingly too long legs (which are crossed with the knees poking out at either side) and deep tan skin give her away. Her lower half is wet, but this stops half way up her back. At first the surroundings might be unfamiliar, Ed is sitting on what looks like a dock, except no...it can't be as the shore line is in the distance. Ed is sitting on one of the floating platforms in the middle of the lake. She's holding something, a long pole with some string or twine tied messily to the top. The twine has been lowered into the water...Ed's fishing. Jachin is unseen at the moment then with a slight "bloop"-ing noise the dull head of a manatee pokes out of the water.]

Any luck, Ed?

[Ed shoots her Daemon a nasty look]

What?

Shhhh!!! Edward would have luck if Jachin wasn't taaaalking!!!

Oh. Uh. I'll be quiet.

Good!

[Silence for a few seconds then Ed uncurls, kicking, swinging her arms (and subsequently the pole) around and bending and unbending so it looks like her spine is undulating]

No fair! No fair! No fair! Fishies are nooooo faaaaiiiir!!

[She kicks the water and bites the makeshift fishing pole angrily. Then after a few seconds of this she lowers the twine back into the water, her legs cease flailing and she sits up straight. Then she begins to sing]

Fishies should come! Ed is fun! She loves to run! She loves to swim! She'll swim and win! Let Edward swim with the fishies! Ed will catch a fish! That is her wish! Fishy fishy fishy! Edward wants a fishy-fish! That is Ed's wishy-wish!! To have a fish to play with! Forthwith! Edward will name him Smiiiiiiiith!!

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[.... Is it retarded?]

Heeelloooo?

Huh?

[Ed visibly perks, then leans back. First her neck bends, then slowly vertebrae by vertebrae, her back follows suit. She takes one hand off her pole to wave at Heather]

Hi-hi!

[Is it even human? Humans don't move that way. Heather waves back, very hesitantly.]

Hey there. I don't think I've seen you around before.

[Ed cocks her head, still upside down]

But Edward has seen her! And her doggie!! She's friends with Eddie!

[Ed sees nothing wrong with that statement, "looking like a stalker" isn't something she worries about.]

... Oh, really? Yeah, that's... Elric. [Who is in the background, sleeping on her bed.] You know Eddie too?

[Eddie and Edward. The girl. So weird.] He's nice, isn't he?

Hi-hi! Elric-Elric!! [She waves enthusiastically, still upside down]

Eddie is nice-nice!! Eddie is a Roadie! He cleans people! And makes them shine! [She says this last sentence in her professor voice. She has abandoned her pole now, and gone up onto her hands walking towards the blackberry Jachin in toe.] Eddie gave Edward frosting! And Jachin and Edward ate it aaaaall!!!

[She looks kind of proud about that]

[Okay, so... the girl's a little weird. Maybe she got dropped on her head as a baby? And then... joined the circus because she's clearly an acrobat. But she seems nice enough. And not threatening. So that's cool.]

Really? He gave me cake batter the other day. He's pretty good at baking, isn't he?

[Ed nods]

Yummy-yummy in Ed's tummy!!

Edited 2010-06-29 02:43 (UTC)

[Heather nods in agreement.] So... hey, um, Ed. How old are you?

How old is Edward?

[She and Jachin exchange a look, Ed's head cocked to the side]

Edward is more than 10 but less than fifteen!! How old is Heather?

So you don't... know for sure? Or are you just making me guess? And me? Oh... I'm seventeen. [That's the least complicated answer, anyway.]

Heather can guess if she wants to, but Edward doesn't know! Edward only knows that Edward is more than ten but less than fifteen.

[Ed listens and nods]

Heather isn't sure either, is she?

So like, your parents didn't tell you your birthday? [Well, if they were weird enough to name a girl Edward...]

[Did she sound unsure there? Crap.] Oh, no. I know. I'm seventeen. Definitely.

Maybe, Edward doesn't remember.

[She scratches her head with her foot]

Okay! Heather is seventeen!

Oh. Okay.

[Awkward beat.]

Your parents aren't here, are they?

Nope, nope, nope! Edward's parents aren't here! Edward doesn't know where Edward's parents are!

Well, that sucks. Uh. My dad's not here either.

You might want to have Jachin change into something else if you actually want to catch anything kiddo. He's probably scaring away the fish from being so close to you.

[Ed leans back to look into the camera upside down. She thinks about this and nods.]

Eddie has a good idea!

[there's a splashing noise. Jachin is now a fat squat bullfrog (http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3119/2399820090_2bb70c7091.jpg) sitting next to Edward on the floating platform. He croaks approvingly.]

[Ed points upwards dramatically leaping wetly to her feet and shouting]

Now Edward will catch a fish!!

[Small laugh from Eddie, Ed sure knows how to make him amused.]

Might want to avoid jumping around too, the fish get spooked by the water moving too much.

[Ed nods very business like dropping down again into a sitting position. She crouches forward staring intently at the water as if she can will a fish out of it]

Staying still and quiet is key to this, so just relax. [Eddie offers directions, probably not too helpful, but he's trying.]

Relax-relax Edward's gotta relax

[And then with this last word she seems to dissolve into a puddle. Ed really DOES seem boneless sometimes]

[The bonelessness just makes the roadie smile, amusement still ringing true as he offers another lovely tidbit of advice.]

Just remember to react when you feel something tugging at the line. That's when you can un-relax. Not a real word, but you get what I mean.

Relaxed Edward will unrelax and leap triumphantly into action!!

Those fish will never know what hit em, that's for damned sure.

Yeah!! Edward will be the best fisher-Edward ever!! And Jachin will be the best fisher-daemon!

[Jachin immediately turns into a fisher cat (http://simplethrift.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/fisher-cat-picture2-1024x731.jpg). Edward is now holding the pole between her feet and lying on her back, arms overhead and flat against the boards]

Session 003 ^_^ Radical Edward ^_^ [Video/voice]

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