badfic_manor | Taunt 005 - M - [Accidental Video] Cats In the Cradle...

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Taunt 005 - M - [Accidental Video] Cats In the Cradle...

Mello did indeed get a baby. A pudgy little pink thing that gurgled at him and got spit on his nice leather. And that is not okay. Mello didn't like kids when he WAS one ~~fuck you to any of you who say he still IS one~~ and he doesn't like them now. Useless little buggers taking up space and crying for attention when they could take that time they are wasting to LEARN how to just say what it is they want rather than being the bane of some poor soul's existence.

Yes. Mello doesn't like babies.

And so if he's going to have to deal with one, he's going to make the thing straighten up and fly right...or hit the road.

[And that is how this video has come to be a baby, probably about 3 yrs of age, perched precariously on a tree branch as Mello waits below for the thing to figure out how to get itself out of danger. Learn early, learn fast. And Mello has no qualms with this because clearly he has the baby's best interests in mind. And if the baby actually manages to pass this test, hell maybe it can be his successor.

Though, that hope disappears all too suddenly when the baby inadvertently FALLS. And tumbling through the sky, disappears midair.

And in turn, the blackberry suddenly falls to the ground where instead of the lean leather clad boy, there is now a bundle of black clothes and a tiny blonde-bobbed head sticking out of the pile. An unhappy looking infant now clad in only a black vest that goes down over his knees and is falling a bit off his tiny shoulders.

Yes. Mello has failed the parenting test]

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I have the lowdest shout EVER [Mihael corrects, pushing himself up when he hears his name, and turns with awkwardly wide and intent eyes to stare at this stranger.

Little hands gripping the hem of his vest-now-turned-dress and tiny brows furrowed, he is sizing you up, L.]

.......do you have candy? [he finally asks. But the question is oddly pointed. Not exactly like he's asking for candy to be given, but instead interrogating L.]

[[L stares back, not blinking, simply rubbing the back of the little one that he's holding. The unnamed little girl that he has to treat like precious porcelain. There's remnants of the Mello that L has come to know, that sizing up look.

He tilts his head like a curious puppy, lifting his hand from his pocket with a small sugary sphere wrapped in plastic.]]

I do. I enjoy candy. Do you enjoy candy, Mihael?

[Mello takes an immediate step back, now looking at L accusingly]

Mr. Roger says that bad people try and give kids candy. [Geez, L, he's not stupid. DUH]

[[L looks absolutely scandalized that Mello just called him a paedophile. He frowns, looking at the candy, then at Mello again, hoisting the little baby who's staring back at the young boy at his feet. He's keeping her quiet relatively save for some adorable baby noises at random.]]

Then I'll just eat it myself.
I'm by far not a bad 'people', I just know the meaning of sharing. Won't you come with me? We'll wait for Roger and see him together when he gets here?

No! [Mello rushes forward to snatch the candy for himself, before shoving it in his mouth, wrapper and all. He doesn't swallow but he's pretty sure the man won't try and take it back if its been in his mouth. Same theory as the "i licked it" strategy often put to use by the other children at the orphanage]

[[L barely has time to react before Mello's got the wrapper and all in his mouth, his eyes wide at the revelation that maybe the kid just swall- oh good.

Good tactic too, L's not stupid enough to go into Mello's mouth for it either.]]

Mihael, you have to first un-wrap the plastic.

[[He takes a few steps forward, little no-name-currently swivelling her head and her almond, black eyes (just like Daddy) stare down at Mello.]]

Come along Mihael, take it out of your mouth and unwrap it. It's unhealthy if you swallow plastic. I won't take it away, I have enough that we can share.

[Reluctantly mello spits out the candy and keeps a wary eye on L as he proceeds to unwrap it, then pop it in his mouth]

Wher are we goingfh [He manges around a cheek full of candy]

[[L sighs, gross, children are so unclean. He'll have to wash Mello's hands some how when they get back to the room, he's got water and a basin if he thinks correctly.]]

Back to my place, Mihael, I need to set the infant down. I can't carry her all day. [[And won't. He's doing this so this doesn't happen to him. Said little girl playing her little stubby fingers in his hair, barely able to hold herself up from her obviously small age.]]

Edited 2011-06-28 02:30 (UTC)

[Mello follows him, nomming sloppily on his candy as he makes a game of only stepping on L's footprints - and obliterating them with a firm stomp.

Destroying things is fun]

Is your wife there? [He asks loudly]

[[L takes a small victory in Mello at least following him ...though that will be tough to keep him from going with others if something comes up. He'll have to keep a close, watchful eye on the young man. Mello's little stompy game causes the pace to slow down, but L doesn't mind as long as nothing comes out at them while he's trying to usher them back to the place. He's got to check on Near too when they get back.

The question catches him off guard.]]

My wife? No, I have no wife. Try to keep up, it's not safe around here.

((OOC: ...er derp. Pretend I was smart enough to type that L took his clothes too rofl. Not just gonna let 'em lay there.))

[Mello cocks his little head] No wife? Then how you have that baby? Did you kidnap that one too?

[Not that Mello thinks he has been kidnapped. Rather he's decided that for the good of mankind ~~and in order to impress the world~~, he'll make it HIS mission to monitor this potential baby-napper.]

[[L pauses, stopping to look back at Mello when not only has he now been a paedophile, but a kidnapper too, of a baby that looks like him no less! Augh! Childreennnuh.]]

No, she's not kidnapped. I'm not a kidnapper nor a bad man, my wife [[Your wife what, L? You don't have a wife.]] is visiting her parents. It's up to me to wait with our little one, responsibility, not kidnapping.

[[He sighs and continues to walk, opening the front door for Mello and shush'ing the whimper at his shoulder.]]
In you go, we're almost there.

[[At least, Mello hasn't asked him to carry him.]]

[Mello stops at that, stomping his little feet and crossing his arms in determination.] But you just said you have no wife.

Are you lying?

[He's not budging until you give him a satisfactory answer]

[[L stops and looks down at Mello. Please, he hasn't had anything substantially sweet in almost a week, tired from searching and now has a baby on his shoulder that if he doesn't properly care for he'll end up like ... Like that.]]

I didn't think it would make sense to you, but that's my mistake. The woman and I aren't married, therefore she's not my wife. The woman who is the mother of this child is not present in my room, she's at her parents.

[Mello's little head tilts to the other side, eyes still wide like saucers as he falls for it hook, line, and sinker.] ......oh.

[He then starts to follow him again, eyes still wide without blinking, but bringing up a little hand to lick at where the candy left sugar on his fingertips]

[[L waits, either that works or he DOES kidnap his succes- ah good. He sighs softly, hoisting again. This thing may be small but holding it for so long, it gets heavy.]]

Mn.

[[He holds open the door still, then closes it behind the young man, continuing to walk. Then Winces.]]

Don't do that. I'll give you more once we get back to my home. Your hands are dirty and otherwise may have germs you don't want to put in yo--

[[L winces AGAIN, why? Because the baby just sneezed on him. Oh sweet lord how he wanted to drop it and put his hands up in the air. Instead. He takes a moment to calm himself down and .... holds it out in front of him at arm's length while they walk.]] --your mouth.

But its sticky! [Mello whines when he is told to stop. He doesn't like having his fingers sticky. And though entirely unaware of his future in skintight black gloves, the boy still searches for something to cover his hands with.

This ends up being the hem of L's shirt.]

[[L sighs.]]
We'll wash them when we get ba-

[[He stares in horrific disbelief. Mello did NOT just use him as a towel dispenser. He did. Ugh. This is not the setting for him to be playing nurse maid. He needs Watari, needs him something horrible.]]

Mihael, that's impolite.

[[He sighs heavily again, blinking as the baby squirms and starts to make little squawking noises while they walk. He stares at it, as though it's the most curious object in the world and watches it start to cry. ...NOW what? L, reluctantly pulls it back in, wincing as it sobs in his ear.

Baby sobbing in his ear, young child wiping hands on his shirt.

He's not cut out to be a parent. He's too young for this.]]

You're impolite! [Mello pouts back before giving a tiny smirk as if it were the greatest comeback IN THE WORLD. Then laughing maniacally he decides to run ahead.]

I'll find the room first!

[[L's eyebrow raises, did Mello just-- yes he did. He's doing the defiant child thing again. With another mighty sigh as he tries to calm the brewing storm that is babyontheshoulder, he watches in horror as Mello cackles like a maniac and runs off.]]

Ah--!! Mello! Wai-.. damnit!

[[With the siren on his shoulder, wailing, he tries to quickly run off to catch Mello. He's got one arm to secure the baby and the other makes a quick grab for the small successor, hoping to catch the little bugger. He'll carry him if he can get his hands on him.]]

MY NAME'S NOT MELLO [He yells over his shoulder, barreling down the hallway as fast as his little legs can carry him. Though yet again, even as a child, Mello is all rash action and forgets something vital - in this instance, looking forward. And as he rounds a corner he slams into a door that has been left open, knocking him flat on his bottom.

And for a long moment he just stares in shock. That is until the pain starts to set in, and those big dark eyes begin to slowly well with crocodile tears. So SOO close to start to sob. He wants to....he can feel a tantrum coming on...]

[[L needs to remind himself of calm blue oceans when Mello shrieks over his shoulder at him, no more yelling. Ever. The shout game is over. He reaches out his hand when Mello goes streaking down the next hall and follows quickly after he hears that horrid thump noise.

He frowns seeing Mello in front of that door, flat out as he is.]]

See, this is why you can't go running off.

[[L's voice is less scolding and more concerned for the little boy, he's run straight on into it by the looks of it. L's thankfully gotten the other screamer down to soft little sobs and shaky noises, kneeling down next to Mello.]]

Let me see, Mihael.

[[He's only got one arm to work with and softly tracks his hand over Mello's head, no blood on his fingers. ...wait. If he doesn't take care of MELLO too, will this happen to him as well? Oh please say he has reprieve from that-- ugh, until he has had time to confirm it, he has no choice.]]

Come here then. You're alright.

[[An arm is held out for the successor to cling should he feel he wanted to.]]

[Mello makes a few little hiccuping noises as as he gingerly lifts himself off the ground, little fist rubbing at an eye as he starts to cry softly. And abruptly he slips under that arm and attaches himself to L's side, hiding his face.

He doesn't want other people to see him cry.]

[[L hates it when people cry. Not because of having much a sense of compassion in most cases, but simply because he's unsure what to do. Normally he'd consult Watari on the course of action best suited, but if he grabs from memory what was done for him in situations like this when he was crying and hurt.. Well, perhaps then it wouldn't be so bad. He's always liked Mello though, always, so seeing him cry is pulling at something.

He curls his arm around Mello, holding the little boy's form to his side and pets gently over the mini-bob of hair. He's obviously hiding and L sort of half hunches over to protect him all the more while he cries.]]

Here then.

[[The detective shifts his arm a bit, and the way he's kneeling and some how, by some divine power, manages to pick Mello up and hoist him to the other side of his neck while his impromptu daughter hides her teary face in the other side.]]

Hold on now, Mihael, I've got you.

[[He sighs, beginning to walk with his arms full of children. This is something he hadn't ever envisioned for himself.]]

[Mello lets L hoist him up, not fight at all. And as he is tucked in against the man he clings for dear life to the fabric of the shirt, still hiding his little face.

He doesn't know where he is. Who these people are. But to be honest it had been nice to be free of Wammy's for a little while. From the kids who were scared of him, or the teachers who scolded him. Out on his own instead...for a few minutes it had been exciting.

But now he's hurt and disoriented and scared. And quietly whispers between his sobs] P-please d-don't tell them I w-was crying.

[they'll laugh at me]

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Re: [Video//Private//Unhackable] children ARE gross, L XD

[Video//Private//Unhackable] LOL all full of dirt and snot, the lot of 'em!

Re: [Video//Private//Unhackable] LOL all full of dirt and snot, the lot of 'em!

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Re: [Video//Private//Unhackable] they're dirty and stubborn

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[Video//Private//Unhackable] THE ICONNNNNN

Re: [Video//Private//Unhackable] Yuss! <3